Shoot. I knew it was my turn...

But I didn't get around to posting anyways. Oh well. Better late than never. Besides, if I had posted, we all wouldn't have gotten to enjoy Sonja's story. Which was totally worth me not writing anything witty.

Still, my wittiness is now to be called upon. But, well, you're probably out of luck.

While not witty, I have been feeling especially creative these days- I've come up with several new story ideas... and one re-"vamp" ing (as it were) of an older story. Yeah, that's right. Vampires. I know, that's HOTT.

What's interesting is that the other night I had a dream and while i was telling my brother - Brynswick Stew, that is, and JB, it was all kind of hazy, as dreams are. And then, JB, being the genius that he is, said it sounded like a good short story. So then the dream went from being randomly hazy to being a story idea. I've even started thinking of how to write it. Which is great... yet another writing idea that i can continue to not work on.

But what's really surprising is that the dream made vague enough sense that it could be worked into a story. Don't you ever have those dreams where you wake up in the middle of the night and think "Ah ha! The next great American novel!" and maybe, if you're really with it, write down the basics. However, the next morning comes along and in the harsh light of day, if you can read your handwriting, the idea is ridiculous and not even worth attempting to put words down on paper?

Yeah, that happens a lot to me. I'm not sure why your psyche things you're so much more brilliant during the night, but I've had a lot of failed story ideas go that way. So it's especially exciting that this one might actually make it. Maybe I'll take a page out of Sonja's book and make it a short story. I'm feeling inspired enough to write a few thousand words, maybe. Although, i probably won't. You know, I'm just saying.

Oh, and for the sake of my entertainment, everyone please email Sonja and ask her how she's doing on her quest to master the hula hoop. Because it would be funny. :)

The Vampire Next Door

In celebration of Puma Man being almost done, I'm going to post my first paranormal short story, written in 1994 when I was a mere 13 years old:

"The Vampire Next Door"
by Sonja Likness
October 31, 1994
Period 4

I challenge you to a game of H-O-R-S-E!" Tyler said in his biggest voice one Halloween afternoon.

"I accept," said Ty's twin sister, Jan.

Ty ran off to get the basketball while Jan tied her long, dark hair up in a ponytail. Ty returned with the ball and threw it to Jan. He laughed as Jan chased after the ball. His brown eyes sparkled as Jan puffed back up the driveway.

"You start," she panted and shoved the ball into Ty's arms.

Ty bounced the ball a few times before making a shot at the free throw line. Jan easily made the same shot. The game dragged on and on. Soon, it started to get dark.

"Come on," said Jan. "Let's just call it a tie. It's getting dark and I still need to get my costume on."

"One more shot," pleaded Ty.

Jan nodded. Ty started running towards the basket. His foot got caught in a crack in the sidewalk. He lunged forward and dropped the ball in the process. Ty landed with a thud. Jan watched as the basketball flew over into the next yard.

"Oh no," she groaned. "Nice going, Twinkle-toes."

Ty shrugged. Jan started to climb the fence.

"No, Jan!" Ty yelled. "Zorana lives there."

"So what?" said Jan. "I want to get the ball back so I can go get my costume on."

"But, Jan," Ty whined, "Zorana is a vampire! She'll suck your blood out and leave your carcass on the ground to rot."

Jan made a face. "That's silly," she said. "Anyway, how do you know she's a vampire? Do you have any proof?"

"Of course I do," replied Ty in his know-it-all voice. "For one thing, she only wears the colors black, red, and white. She never wears anything else. She has huge canine teeth. She dyes her hair blonde, but it's really black. And most importantly, I saw her eyes glow in the dark one night when she was getting her paper."

"Oh, come on," said Jan.

Ty shook his head. Jan could see he was truly afraid.

"Look, Ty," she said gently. "If she comes outside in broad daylight, then she's not a vampire, okay?"

Ty reluctantly followed Jan over the fence and into Zorana's yard. By now, it was really dark, and try as they might, the twins could not find the basketball.

"Hey," whispered Jan. "I think I hear something. It sounds like... chanting. Come on. Let's find out what it is."

Jan led the way and Ty followed closely behind. Soon the twins came upon a circle of goblins, vampires, witches and the like dancing in a circle around a huge bonfire chanting word that the twins couldn't make out. They stared in awe at the strange sight. They were so intent on the strange party that they didn't hear someone approaching from behind.

"Hello children. Might you be looking for THIS?" said a woman who Ty recognized to be Zorana.

She hurled the ball at Jan who was knocked over by the weight of it. The children sat stunned and stared at Zorana who was towering over them. She had on a black cape, a white shirt, and a long black skirt. Her black hair curled around her shoulders and framed her face.

"You must never tell anyone what you have seen here tonight," whispered Zorana hoarsely.

"Why?" croaked the twins in unison.

"Because I didn't think to invite your parents to my little dinner party," said Zorana in an evil sort of way. She smiled, exposing her fangs. "Happy Halloween," she cackled.

The End

To sleep, perchance to dream, aye, there's the rub

I realize I have yet again fallen behind in posting. And will probably continue to do some in the next few weeks, since I'm going walkabout on Sunday to go visit law schools. And friends. :)

At any rate, I have nothing to offer Sonja in the way of advice for getting up earlier... I love sleep. Not even cattle prods would convince me to wake up earlier if I didn't think i was ready to get up. My mom (and brynmuffin will corroborate this) used to be SO cheerful that she would sing obnoxiously cheery songs in the morning to wake us up. I once chucked a pillow at her and told her i was practicing for the weekend. This, however, did not work. Alas, as a result, now that I'm no longer forced to wake up for, say, work, I don't. Simple as that :) JB does occasionally drag me out of bed with him (the crazy man only needs a little bit of sleep! how weird is that?)

Anyways, to connect sleep and inspiration, I have 2 stories. One involves an old book and one involves a new one.

The first: While i was writing my first book as my senior thesis in college, I was having troubles coming up with a title for it. I strained my brain trying to think of something and couldn't come up with a title that suited it. So one night I went to sleep after a hard day's work of typing. Ah ha! Suddenly, I woke up in the middle of the night with the most insightful title i could never have thought up awake. I was so excited! It was perfect. The book would sell on the title alone. This was it. Of course, I thought that i should write it down, but couldn't find any paper near my bed and thought to myself "Well, it's so perfect, I'll never forget" Yep, bet you can guess the ending to this story... I woke up the next morning with the memory of having thought of the perfect title.... AND NO MEMORY OF THE TITLE ITSELF. Ugh. It took me several months to come up with another one that I'm quite sure isn't as good as the first: Misdirection. Of course, I'm left to wonder if i ever really came up with the perfect title or i just dreamed that I did. You know how when you dream and you think you've solved something perfectly and you wake up and are like "well, obviously my brain is on crack because that wouldn't work in a million years?" well, it's possible that's what happened. But i prefer to believe in my genius. And then my lameness in forgetting. :)

Oh, and I should add as a p.s. to that story that when I actually thought up Misdirection as a title, I was flying somewhere and had another ah ha moment. And then remembering my mistake of last time, asked the man sitting next to me if i could borrow his pen for a minute to write it down. :) Lesson learned.

The second story involves a dream from just the other night. It's all getting vaguer in my head as time passes, but it spawned an idea for a book that I still remember, so I'm counting that as progress. The dream involved a lot of lawyers, basically, and as the dream progressed in odd ways (which I'm not sharing because it'll take too long) I figured out that all of the lawyers for this law firm i was dreaming about were VAMPIRES. Yeah, basically, i can't figure out if I'm 1) reading too many vampire stories, 2) watching too many back episodes of Boston Legal or 3) am really nervous about becoming a lawyer and having everyone hate me. What do you all think?

My story idea, of course, is way cooler. :) But yes, it includes vampires and lawyers all the same. Lucky me!