Pant. Ees.

So, despite the doctor telling Skye that if she traveled this week, the turbulence could dislodge her newly poked-at retina, she is now in sunny (I keed, I keed) Oregon, most likely shouting orders to Craig in a piratey fashion. (She actually isn't wearing the eyepatch anymore but I bet she got it out and put it on just so she could go, "Arrr! Look lively there, ye bilge rat!")

And I am now tasked with keeping the blog up to date until she unburies from the moving excitement. Also, I am tasked with writing the most embarrassing thing I can think of for Craig to read out loud to Skye, since she's not allowed to read anything with her own two eyes and therefore has to have Craig do it. Or whoever else is around. I was privileged to perform a dramatic reading of the pina colada recipe on the back of the pina colada mix at her goodbye soiree this weekend. (Skye, that's S-O-I-R-E-E. Did he pronounce it right?)

Anyway, I'm not very creative, and the only thing I can think of is to type "panties" a bunch of times, or perhaps talk about the many benefits of the tampon as opposed to the pad. But, really, ick, I don't want to talk about that any more than Craig wants to read it out loud to his sweetie.

Panties.

Panties.

Panties.

Even worse...

Not only is it super tragic that Sonja and I are going to be ripped asunder (good word, right?) but something else has happened to make our separation even more depressing. I have this super lame eyeball problem (for the details, see my blog) that means that after June 8, I'm not allowed to read or use my computer for 3 WEEKS! Eeek!

How do people deal without email? More importantly, how am i supposed to keep in touch with my now long distance bestest buddy if i can't even use the computer. We briefly considered using the phone but discarded that quickly enough.

I'm paraphrasing:

me: I can't email or read for 3 weeks
Sonja: haha cuz your eyeball would pop
me: thanks, you're so supportive
Sonja: Well how the hell am I supposed to keep in touch with you until RWA if you can't read? God, I guess I'm going to have to CALL you.

silence falls upon both keyboards for almost 10 seconds

both of us: Never mind
me: I'll just see you at the conference then.
Sonja: Good idea.

See? We may be bestest buddies, but we're not crazy or anything.

The reality is that Sonja's just jealous that i get to be a pirate and live the dream. I mean, who doesn't want to wear an eyepatch?

Gar!